I’m fed up with their stupid, faux-cheery grinning faces. I’m fed up with their inability to give a straight answer. I’m fed up with their cavalier use of public money to fund new BBQs and sink plugs. I’m fed up with the utter mess they’ve put our country in through slack policing of the banking system and too much back slapping of its criminal bosses. I’m fed up with daft rules and refulations, high tax bills, increased petrol prices and television adverts which treat us all like dribbling buffoons.
But most of all I’m fed up with our government’s lack of respect for the public’s collective intelligence.
Just how stupid do they think we are? Forgetting the recent slate of MPs clamouring to get out of Westminster’s back door and instead looking back at the last few weeks of expense claim scandals, I can’t express how angry I am at these bungling, arrogant, tax-doging tosspots we’re supposed to rely on.
Pulling such stunts in any other job in Britain would see them out on their ear without as much as their pencil sharpner to keep as a momento. It’s made all the worse by the fact that the very systems they’re dodging and taking advantage of are the systems they develop and instruct us to follow.
The fact that so many of our illustrious politicians are clinging onto their jobs until they can claim a substantial pay off only serves to remind us of one thing; greed is the cancerous underbelly of Westminster.
What I can’t get my head round is what these people actually spend their money on. Let’s be frank, they’re not exactly on the minimum wage, yet the fact they literally claim for everything from ‘gardening services’ (I wouldn’t be entirely suprised if we hear some of those services being of the uphill variety in the coming days…) to, unbelievably, an actual kitchen sink, leaves very little for their genuine wage to cover. One minister even claimed for Sky TV, citing its 24 hour rolling news channels as an essential tool for his job. I wonder if he’s watching them now.
It’s greed beyond belief. The minister who claimed for a church donation of £5 should be shot. I mean that. I’m not a religous man but what he’s done there is wrong on just about every conceivable level. The idiot who claimed for that kitchen sink (I can’t remember who it was exactly but I’m fairly sure it was gaffe-prone Jacqui Smith) surely, at some stage, must have thought when they filed the receipt that, one day, such an expense claim would allow the Sun’s headline pun department to leave work early.
I file expense claims every month. It has never, and will never, cross my mind that I could perhaps slip the odd TV license or pair of flip flops through. Like most companies, we check all receipts and so we should. Providing a ‘floor limit’ for claims – the government’s being around £400 – is a recipe for piss taking on a major scale.
So where do we go from here? As I write, Defence Secretary, John Hutton, has resigned. This follows several other big name resignations including Jacqui Smith, James Purnell and Hazel Blears. You’ve no doubt read enough superlatives about Brown’s empire collapsing around him, so I won’t embellish on it any further. Instead, I’ll finish on a letter to our right honourable oiks:
Dear The Government
Just go away.