Ten year glitch

So, for the first time in ten years, I had to call BT's technical support line. I've heard some stories about these people, but never experienced them first hand because, to be perfectly fair, our broadband service has not faltered once in a decade.

An ode to my future wife

To my relief, I learned that favours are just little presents you give to everyone. But I didn't know that. And because I didn't even know of their existence, they would not have been present at the wedding, had I organised it.

British Smash

...in the ten years they've paid someone else to pump gas and electricity into my house, the only offer I've had from them is for boiler cover. Or a new boiler. Free of charge, I wondered? No, I'd have to pay for either, but they would send the nice smiley man you see on the adverts who definitely wouldn't rape me.